Jerry Summers: Dog Owners Revolt

Not since Prohibition, WWII, the recent banning of abortion by the United States Supreme Court, or the Biden/Trump scenario has there been such a political hot potato as a proposed joint bill filed in the Tennessee General Assembly in Nashville in the first week of January 2024.

Choo Choo City is proud that it has a booming pet (dogs, cats, snakes, gators, etc.) population that are allowed to freely roam the streets (on a leash), urinate, defecate, and the vast majority of time leave a momento of their visit. Unfortunately a shortage of litter bags from China has restricted the vast majority of considerate pet owners from picking up the residue of their little (and big) darlings.

Setting aside any minor concerns that may have increased the duties of the dedicated public works employees in Gig City’s new government funded “Poop and Scoop” division, a much more serious crisis has been created by the introduction of a non-pet-friendly piece of legislation.

Briefly stated the proposed law would prohibit emotional support animals (ESAs) that are not trained, or being trained, to perform tasks or work for a person with a disability from indoor areas of food service.

There have been historical accusations in the Choo Choo City's political past where not only deceased individuals were allowed to vote, but their favorite pets were also included on ballots under the family name.

Other alleged political acts of misconduct and violations of the sacred constitutional right to a fair election involved the the practice of purchasing a back tax lot for $100, creating residency rights to vote in a municipal election, and then registering 500 of your closest friends to become co owners on the same postage stamp size property.

Back to the public outcry that has just begun and it is anticipated that the impartial Secretary of State's Office is expected to monitor the situation closely to keep the Volunteer State from becoming involved in a test case before the Tennessee and United States Supreme Courts. A difference of opinions has already begun that may necessitate the American Society of Prevention of Cruelty to Animals (ASPCA) and American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU) initiate litigation to protect the rights of all critters, large or small, from being discriminated against with action by members of the Tennessee General Assembly.

(It is predicted that the duly elected members of the Hamilton County legislative delegation during the election year of 2024 will diligently seek a solution that will protect all of the constitutional rights of all two and four legged citizens in Nashville!)