MILLENNIALS do things differently. Those born between 1981 and 1996 exercise more, eat better and smoke less than previous generations. They may also be parenting differently. Look around and you’ll see that today’s 20- and 30-somethings are just as likely to be seen walking doted-upon doggies as pushing babies in buggies.
Take 38-year-old British actress Jamella Jamil. She recently said that her two dogs were all the responsibility she wanted in life.
Emily in Paris star Lily Collins (35) and Game of Thrones actress Emilia Clarke (37) are other examples of celebrity millennials who are child-free owners of pampered pooches.
Baby Boomers and Gen Xers typically started their families in their 20s. In 1975, the average age of a first-time mother was 24.8. In 2000, it was 27.4. But in 2024, it’s 31.5.
Parenthood isn’t the only traditional marker of adulthood that’s been pushed further into the future for millennials. A recent report issued by the Parliamentary Budget Office revealed that the average house price nationwide had doubled from €153,00 in 2013 to €305,000 in 2022. Wage increases, however, have not kept pace. The median salary of a single person increased by only 26% from €33,000 to €41,800 over the same period. Unsurprisingly, millennials’ chances of becoming homeowners fell proportionately, with the number of homeowners aged between 25 and 34 dropping from 60% to 27% over that decade.
Precarious housing could help explain why millennials are reluctant to have children. The sky-high cost of childcare may be another factor. According to a 2021 report by Pobal, a State body that works in early childhood care and education, the average cost of full-time childcare in Ireland was over €9,000 a year. Compare that with the €1,600 that Dogs Trust Ireland estimates it costs to care for a dog.
An analysis study published in the Journal of Emerging Technologies and Innovative Research also shows that millennials don’t have the same priorities as the generations that came before them. They value self-development, friendships and experiences such as travelling and might not want the responsibility of parenthood to affect their freedom to enjoy these activities.
A 2021 survey of millennial American women who had chosen not to have children backs up this argument. Some 38% said children required too much time and energy, with 32% preferring to prioritise their career and education instead and another 40% opting to spend more time on hobbies.
Pets are cheaper, less time-consuming and less stressful. Perhaps it’s no wonder that 69% of the women interviewed in the US study had adopted a dog or cat instead of having a baby.
Becoming a pet owner brings some unexpected benefits. A 2015 Harvard Medical School report showed that there are proven advantages to having a dog. For example, dog owners are less prone to loneliness, depression and anxiety. They are also more likely to have lower blood pressure, healthier cholesterol levels and a lower risk of heart disease than non-dog owners.
Puppy love
There are many reasons why millennials might embark on puppy parenthood instead of having a baby. The Irish Examiner asked four of them to explain why it made sense to them.
Lisa and Lee Brassil are both 30. She’s a technical recruiter, and he’s a software engineer. They got married last year and live in Naas with their four-year-old dog, Bowie, a cross between a labrador and a doberman.
He’s their one and only baby. “Lee and I are both eldest children and spent a lot of time babysitting our siblings when we were younger, which is one of the reasons why we’ve decided not to have children ourselves,” says Lisa.
Finances are another factor, with the couple both expressing shock at how much their friends have to spend on their children. “Dogs are nothing like as expensive,” says Lisa.
The environmental impact of children is another concern. “There are so many people in the world already,” says Lisa. “We don’t need more.”
Lee adds that a dog suits their lifestyle better. “We can leave him alone in the house when we go out and he’ll just sleep,” he says. “A kid could never be left alone like that.”
They adopted rescue dog Bowie in April 2021. “He changed our lives,” says Lee. “Because he needs consistency and has to be let out in the morning, go for walks, be fed at certain times and played with, he has brought much more structure and routine to the way we live.”
Because they both work on a hybrid basis, one of them is usually at home with Bowie. On the rare occasions they are not, they book him into a dog daycare centre nearby.
They took as much care choosing this centre as any first-time parent would. “We’ve heard horror stories about how dogs are treated in some of them,” says Lee. “We didn’t want that for Bowie.”
They have been pleasantly surprised by certain aspects of dog ownership, such as the impact on their exercise levels. “We’re definitely leaving the house and moving more,” says Lisa.
There’s also the depth of the bond they have with him. “Whenever you come back to the house, he acts as if seeing you is the best thing ever,” says Lisa. “Experiencing the full force of that unconditional love is so special.”
Like all proud parents, they enjoy spoiling their ‘baby’. They buy him toys and treats. “We made him a cake for his birthday and made him dog-friendly pancakes on Pancake Tuesday,” says Lee.
“We also bought him a coat to wear when it’s cold outside and a selection of little bowties and scarves that he likes to show off,” adds Lisa.
Their relationship with Bowie elicits mixed reactions from family and friends. “Our best friends have a collie who they love just as much as we love Bowie,” says Lisa. “But some of our family think we’re spoiling him. They also think that we’re bound to want kids eventually. We know that we’ll only ever have dogs.”
Mental health boost
Carolina Alvarez-Mon is 29 and from Spain. She currently lives in Skerries with her 32-year-old partner Aidan Kehoe, who is an accountant, and their two dogs.
Her love for dogs stems from childhood. “When I was a teenager, we adopted a puppy and from the very beginning, he felt like a little brother to me,” she says.
That dog died in 2021, by which time Alvarez-Mon had moved to Ireland to work for Google. His death inspired her to get a dog of her own.
That dog was Rollo, a springer spaniel, who was recently joined by Kimi, a lurcher. Both are rescue dogs.
Alvarez-Mon is aware that at her age, previous generations of women would have been busy raising a family of children, not dogs. “But I feel too young for kids,” she says. “I’m still growing my career and discovering myself more. I love studying and have lots of hobbies. If I had children, I’d have to put all my time and energy into them.”
Unlike children who would make demands on her, Alvarez-Mon believes dogs only contribute positively to her life. “They are so good for my mental health,” she says. “I’m never lonely when I’m with them. They are so loving and loyal and never want anything in return.”
Even though her dogs aren’t as demanding as children, she enjoys treating them like babies. She gives them freshly made food to eat, buys them toys to play with, makes personalised bandanas and woollen winter accessories to wear and even cuddles up with them in bed.
Not everyone understands her attachment to her dogs. “My family think it’s weird,” she says. “They don’t understand that my dogs are my children. My brother does though. He asks me to send him pictures of his ‘nephews’. My friends understand too. They know that my dogs are the best thing that’s happened to me and that I want to share my life with them.”
Nurture and joy
Bhavya Badola is 29 and lives in Dublin. The marketing professional is engaged to Adi Sharma, a 36-year-old data centre engineer, and they recently adopted Una, a rescue puppy, a mix of pitbull and shar pei.
“So far, she has been a joy,” says Badola, who moved to Ireland from India in 2017.
Even though they are in a committed relationship and live in a house big enough for children, adopting a pet seemed far more appealing than the idea of starting a family.
“In India, traditionally, women would have had at least one or two kids by the time they were my age, but I think it’s scary,” says Badola. “When we were on holidays in Rome last year and Santorini recently, I saw parents struggling with buggies and kids and thought to myself that I didn’t know if I could ever do that.”
The level of commitment required by dogs is just right for Badola at this stage of her life. “Dogs are dependent on you in lots of ways but whereas kids fight with you and have issues of their own that you have to deal with, dogs have love and cuddles,” she says. “They only make life happier.”
This is not to deny the challenges involved in dealing with a puppy. “Una is my first puppy and I’m surprised by how hard it is,” she says. “If you don’t watch her like a hawk, she’ll have chewed through cables, eaten all the toilet paper, or made holes in your clothes.”
However, having Una adds to Badola’s life in many other ways. “I have to take her for a walk even if it’s raining,” she says. “I’d skip the walk if it was raining if it wasn’t for her.”
She also enjoys nurturing Una. “Getting her up in the mornings, giving her meals, walking and playing with her – I love all that,” she says. “I like reading up on the best things to give her to eat and the best toys for her to play with. She loves rattle toys and toys you can tug on and we’ve also got a lovely selection of jumpers and jackets for her to wear.”
Badola’s family is supportive of her decision to adopt Una.
“They know how much I love her and how much joy she has brought to my life,” she says. That makes them happy.”
Health benefits
A growing body of research shows that dog ownership is good for our physical and mental health.
It may help with reducing allergy levels. A 2015 study published in JAMA Paediatrics found that exposure to dogs from a young age was linked to a lower risk of childhood asthma.
It could also be good for our heart. As far back as 1992, an Australian study reported that pet owners had lower blood pressure levels than non-pet owners despite having similar body mass index and socioeconomic profiles.
It usually results in us exercising more. A 2013 study from the Journal of Physical Activity and Health revealed that dog owners were more active than people who didn’t own dogs because they got their steps in during daily walks and physically played with their dogs regularly. Having a dog meant they took an average of 2,760 more steps per day, amounting to an additional 23 minutes of moderate exercise.
It can make us feel better. Researchers at the Johns Hopkins School of Medicine reported that simply stroking a pet lowers the stress hormone cortisol, while the social interaction between people and their dogs increases levels of the feel-good hormone oxytocin. This feelg-good response could explain why a 2022 study into the impact of service dogs on military veterans and first aid responders with post-traumatic stress disorder found that being paired with a dog led to a reduction in symptoms in 84% and allowed 40% to decrease their medications.
A Miami University study published in 2011 found that pet owners had better self-esteem than non-pet owners.
A 2018 analysis of the existing data concluded that having a pet can help mitigate mental health problems, particularly depression.
A University of Florida study published in 2022 showed that older adults who had owned a pet for over five years scored higher on cognitive tests than older adults without pets. The study authors suggested that this could be linked to enhanced levels of oxytocin, increased physical activity, lower blood pressure, and reduced stress levels — all health benefits associated with owning a dog.
